Last week we heard the gospel call us to listen to the Spirit in and through the teachings of Jesus. Recall Martha was busy and distracted by the needs of providing for Jesus and the guests that he brought with him, while Mary her sister had chosen to sit at Jesus’ feet and be taught the ways of the kingdom of God. Jesus told Martha that Mary had chosen what was best, and was in effect telling Martha, the most important thing Martha, even in the busyness of daily life, is to listen to the Spirit. The utterances of the Spirit bring real nourishment for both soul and body, and bring energy to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, and to love our neighbors as ourselves. “Listen to the Spirit,” Jesus taught. So convincing and authentic was Jesus’ practice of the spiritual life, that the disciples and early church concluded that to hear from Jesus was to hear from the Holy Spirit.

In the gospel reading today we hear that in response to seeing knowing Jesus and seeing him at prayer, the disciples asked for him to teach them to pray. That’s marvelous. What would our lives look like, if our own piety was so winsome, that others came to us and asked us, “I see you, would you teach me to pray?”

There’s a story of a church school teacher, proud and self-assured in his Christianity, who asked his Sunday School class, “Why would people look at me and think I was a Christian? A little boy answered, “Because they don’t know you?”

Jesus’ life and practice of piety was winsome and attractive. People sought him out to teach them to get in touch with the Spirit.

Today’s readings are a collection of Jesus’ teachings on prayer, and probably were not all given together at one time. There are three distinct sections. In the first Jesus models prayer and teaches what we now call the Lord’s prayer. In the second Jesus motivates persistent prayer through promises to those who ask, seek and knock on the door of God’s benevolence. In the third section, Jesus teaches that God is ever eager to give us the Holy Spirit.

In all of this teaching on prayer, God is imaged as a kind, benevolent “Abba” (Papa) Father who protects us from privation, prevents us from times of ultimate testing, is merciful, and grants to all who ask, all who seek do find, and all who knock have the divine door opened to them.

I think this portrayal of God is one with which most of us will resonate. Yet, the most difficult part of the teaching for us is the confidence and assurance with which Jesus portrays the promises. We read in 11:10 “For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened”. This is I think the hardest passage in our reading today for our own personal experience in the life of prayer just doesn’t jive with this teaching. We have all experienced unanswered prayer, have seen and lost loved ones for whom we have prayed. There are times when it does seem that we are knocking, and NoOne is answering. It’s confusing, and hard to reconcile our experience with these lofty promises offered in our reading. Unfulfilled expectations can be so very disappointing, and can mark our psyches and souls.

So, what does our Lord mean when he sets up such a set of expectations- ask and ye shall receive, seek ad you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened to you?

It certainly does not mean that we will receive whatever we want and ask for. All we have to do is to look at Jesus’ life and recognize that this teaching can not mean that we will always get what we want. As an infant he was hunted and forced to be a refugee. In his adult ministry, nearly pushed off a cliff. In the garden of Gethsemane Jesus asked for the cup of suffering to pass him by, and it did not. It seems safe to say that Jesus did not receive everything he might have wanted from God. The Older Testament prophets foretold that the Messiah would be “a man of sorrows, well-acquainted with grief.” The shortest sentence in the gospel is, “Jesus wept.” It is clear the promise that those who seek will find cannot mean that we will get whatever we pray for. So how can we understand the promises that Jesus offers in this passage, ask, seek and knock?

I think the key is in the very last verse, which represents the highest point of Jesus teaching on prayer: “If you know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” The ultimate gift of God received in the asking, is the presence of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit, the mysterious third person of the Trinity, is the divine creative spirit who consoles the people of God and who builds in us faith, hope and love. With the presence of the Holy Spirit who is love-in-action, we can face whatever trials may come. For at the end of the day, what do we really need, but the presence of God? To whom else can we turn, for in God are the words of eternal life. Jesus is making it clear that what we can be assured of receiving in prayer is the presence of God in the Holy Spirit. This is to be an important object of our prayer- the presence of the Holy Spirit. Many ancient prayers, and some even in the Book of Common Prayer begin with asking for the Spirit’s presence. This is a good practice for us to recover, for God deeply desires to give us the Spirit, and all who ask, receive.

But how does this work? It sounds so mystical. And it is here that we do touch upon the mystical roots of our faith. Practically speaking though, the dynamics of being in relationship with God and recognizing the presence of the Holy Spirit follow closely the dynamics of being in relationship with anyone else. The key to intimacy in a relationship is communication, the sharing of friend with friend, says Theresa of Avila (16^th C Spain). By asking, seeking, knocking, by sharing our lives with God by communicating our lives to God and being open to God.

Therapist Diane Marshall has written that among our many human needs, three fundamental needs in healthy relationships are to know that….

I am worthy, I have value

My thoughts, feelings and experiences matter

Someone really cares about me…

These three are indicators of healthy human relationships, and these three are found in a prayerful relationship with God.

The first: I am worthy, I am of value. In prayer we enter knowing that we have value in God’s eyes. We are made in the Image and Likeness of God. We are God’s handiwork, God’s children, and thus have intrinsic dignity and worth.

The second need in a healthy relationship is to know that our thoughts, feelings and experiences matter. This is called “verification.” In the book of psalms, in the Lord’s prayer, we are taught to open our hearts to God and to share our joys, burdens and needs. In so doing, we learn that God cares about what we care about, as any parent cares about the deep longings of their own children. God cares deeply about what we care about.

Thirdly, a key need in any relationship is the knowledge that we are cared for. God is love, and we are loved with an everlasting love. In the Christian tradition, the highest testimony of God’s loving of human beings is the death of the Son on the cross- so much are we loved.

Let us then press forward in our prayer lives, secure in knowing that God desires to be in relationship with us, in a healthy relationship with us that honors our dignity, values our life experiences, and is grounded in love for us. May we go forward then, seeking the height of prayer, secure too in the promise that those who seek the Presence of the Holy Spirit, God’s own presence with us, will not be turned away. Amen